What Happens If A Man Truly Loves You? Go with Teeanime for all your doubts!
How can a man who claims to really love me hurt me? How much of this was real? Did I miss anything subtle? Were I not enough?
I gave him my body, my heart, my loyalty, and everything I could. I was his shoulder to lean on and the person he talked to. Was she worth it at all?
Oh, God only knows how many times I stayed up late. I picked up what little pride I still had and walked away without turning around. I couldn’t believe that he broke my heart and wasted my time at the same time. How dare they!
As the months went by, dating started to seem hard. I was afraid and didn’t trust people of the other gender. Whenever I became friends with a guy, I felt sad because I knew it wouldn’t lead to anything. Right now, I’m a little too scared to be in love.
I met a man after a year. I had given up on the opposite sex, so I didn’t expect anything from him. I really didn’t trust people, so I didn’t want to put too much into the friendship. He didn’t give up and always asked me to hang out. I really liked being around him, so I kept running into him. Six months later, I realized I was starting to care about him. We both knew we liked each other, but he didn’t know that I was in love with him. Why shouldn’t I?
He was kind, a friend, and a good listener. He really cared about what I had to say. He showed me that love shouldn’t hurt, and because of him, I have higher standards.
1. Respect is more important than love
Have you ever witnessed a couple (be it strangers on the street or like me, a friend and her boyfriend) arguing and the man gets angry and starts name calling?
If you are dating a man that doesn’t know how to control his anger to the point that he lashes out and verbally abuses you, then their love is questionable. When did love become abusive?
I cannot compromise my respect for your love. You can keep your love, I will keep my respect — Amit Kalantri
Respect is more important than love in a healthy relationship. Because if everyone respects each other, everything else will fall into place. People think that love is all you need in a relationship, but respect is just as important. You can’t love someone you don’t respect.
He respects not only you, but also what you both have. He knows that this relationship is a very fragile bubble that needs to be taken care of.
When a man loves you, he doesn’t care about other girls because he’s loyal to you. Not just because he likes you, but also because he likes himself and his word.
We have no control over who we fall in love with, but we can choose who we respect. We can’t control love because it happens automatically, but we can choose to respect someone (a conscious decision)
When a man loves you, he shows it in everything he says, does, tries, and thinks.
2. He will say it but it won’t be misused
Don’t you think it’s funny that a man can meet you at noon and be in love with you by midnight? How? How can a man use such a strong word on someone he doesn’t even know? If a man tells you quickly that he loves you, please don’t believe him. He doesn’t love you; he probably just wants a smack and would do or say anything to get you to drop the pants in a flash.
I remember when I told my boyfriend I loved him. I said it first, and he didn’t say anything back. He didn’t want to say it back just because I said it; he wanted to say it because he meant it. I didn’t hurry him because I knew that if he really loves me, I’ll be the first to know. His decision made me respect him even more. And it was worth the wait when he finally said it.
3. They let their actions speak for them
If I had a dollar for every time a guy talked nice to me but then let me down, I’d probably be in the top 1% of the world by now.
I’ve seen different women believe what a man says and not pay attention to what he does. He says he cares about you, but what he does shows that he doesn’t. He says you can count on him, but he isn’t there when you need him. He says he keeps his word, but he always breaks it.
4. He claims you. What’s “Let’s see where this is going?”
Please run away from a man who says, “Let’s see where this goes.” I know where it’s headed: nowhere!
He’ll tell you that he likes how things are between you two and hopes they stay that way, but really, all this guy wants is the benefits of being in a relationship without the responsibilities.
If a man really loves you, he won’t send you mixed messages. He won’t make you doubt how he really feels about you and where you stand in his life.
5. They always want to communicate with you (text and calls)
A man who doesn’t want to talk to you every day isn’t in love with you. How can he truly love you but not talk to you for days? Boo, that’s not love. Yes, I get that we might sometimes want our own space, but that doesn’t mean we can’t talk.
If a man takes days to get back to you, whether it’s by sending or replying to a message or calling you, that’s a red flag and you should be careful with him.
If he runs away when you have a fight instead of trying to talk things out, he’s not right for you.
When a man loves you, he will check on you at different times of the day to make sure you are okay or call you because he was thinking about you.
If a man says he loves you but doesn’t talk to you for 24 hours, you should drop him. You are now single and can date anyone you want.
6. He will treat you like a Queen
I never dated chivalrous men, or maybe they didn’t love me enough, but I always had hope that there were kind, protective, and loyal men in a world that didn’t seem to have many of them. Also, this has nothing to do with the fact that I watch a lot of Ryan Gosling movies and want my own handsome man.
But when I started going out with my boyfriend, he showed me how a man should treat a woman. I was shocked because I couldn’t believe how much I’d settled for average love because I didn’t know I deserved better.
He showed me in subtle ways, like making sure he walks on the curb side of the road to protect me or not eating his food because mine hadn’t arrived yet.
Pay attention to the little things. Does he keep you waiting if he says he’ll call at 3 p.m.? Does he open doors for you? Sit after you sit? Don’t walk in front of you? Give you his coat when you’re cold? Walk you to your car or even an Uber/taxi? Praise you when you doubt yourself? Always on his iPhone when you should be spending time together instead of putting it down and paying attention to you?
If he’s not a pig with no culture, he’d also leave the toilet seat down, which I think is chivalrous.
If he does none of these things, he’s not right for you.
7. He gives without expectations
Men used to go to great lengths to get a woman’s first date, but those days are over. But now, men either do something lazy that doesn’t take much work, like invite her over to watch Netflix and hang out, so he can try to take her to bed later. Or, take her to a $30/$200 dinner date with a hidden agenda.
If a man loves you, he will take you out on a date, no matter how much it costs, whether it’s $30 or $200. All he wants in return is for you to get home safe.
Note: Watch how he treats people he doesn’t know. For example, waiters and waitresses, security guards, and people who need him to do them a favor. Is he a jerk? Is he good?
When a man does something for you, he does it because he cares about you.
8. It’s never your problem, it’s our problem
When you need help, you really don’t know who is there for you. I’ve heard scary stories where a guy says he loves a girl but leaves her when she needs him the most.
Now, I’m not saying that he should pay your student loans or credit card bills, but I want to know how much he cares when you need help. Does he try to cheer you up? Does he care about you? Does he hold your hair when you throw up after a night of drinking? Instead of calling an Uber or taxi to take you to the hospital at 4 a.m. because you’re sick, can I drive you there?
If a man loves you, he cares about what’s going on in your life. He knows that when his wife is sad, he feels sad too. For a class presentation, he will work with you like a teammate and try to find a solution or a way out. He won’t let you walk through fire alone. Instead, he’ll go with you. In return, he would want you to be there for him when he has a problem, just like he was for you.
9. He makes you better
Having people around you who want the best for you is very important. When I think about the relationships I’ve had in the past, I did most of the caring and never got as much back.
As a woman, I’m supposed to not only look perfect but also live a perfect life. I pushed and inspired my previous partner to be the best he could be. I did paraklesis on men who needed healing, as I always did.
Paraklesis: A speech that encourages and comforts. It’s a speech that heals the mind. For example, when you tell someone, “Don’t worry about what other people think, everything will be fine.”
But when I met my boyfriend, it stopped being one-sided all of a sudden. I remember crying one day because I couldn’t stop thinking, “This is how I’ve always wanted to be treated; why haven’t other guys done this for me?”
Finally, someone gave me hope, pushed me forward, and made me love myself more. Since I was in a different country and didn’t have any family nearby, I needed that support. I went back to being very driven, and I stopped failing at college. He told me things I had never heard before. I know I can fly with him in my life.
When your life is better because he is in it, you know he loves you.
10. To know it is true love, it will give you peace of mind
Love isn’t love if it doesn’t bring peace along with it. If a man loves you, you won’t be in constant pain or discomfort, both mentally and truly.
A man who really loves you won’t upset your peace of mind or make you doubt or worry. He will make you trust him and believe what he says, even when he is quiet or not around.
This is the end of the article. I hope you learned something and maybe even had a few laughs.