We asked some of our favorite relationship writers what you should wear, where you should go, and what mistakes you should never make on a first date. So, come on over to Teenime and learn how to know the dos and don’ts for first dates.
1/25
DON’T think too far ahead
It’s fine to get excited before going out with a new person, but don’t lose sight of reality. Even though this sounds gloomy, if you don’t expect much from a date, a good date will be a pleasant surprise and a bad date won’t be a big deal.
2/25
DO be open to unexpected date ideas
A home-cooked meal, a PBR, and Guitar Hero might be a better way to get to know each other than going to a restaurant and a movie. Also, in this economy, are you really going to ask someone to take you out for filets, cocktails, and the theater? The Daily Dish by Tango, Tom Miller
3/25
DON’T go somewhere overflowing with eye candy
4/25
DO wear sexy underwear
5/25
DO wear flats
Although heels might be quite seductive, you never know where a first date will take you. I’ve gone on first dates that culminated in a wonderful walk around town (hello, blisters!) or a trip to a local playground (tripping all over myself!). Flats will allow you to feel open to whatever the night may bring. —Smitten author Joanna Goddard
6/25
DO bring dental supplies with you
7/25
DO call a friend for a pep talk
If you have first-date anxiety, call a buddy for some words of encouragement before meeting the guy. Before my first dates, you could always find me in a cab with my mom on the phone, telling her that the guy would be insane not to admire me. Despite the fact that she had to say it (she is my mother), a few encouraging words let me walk into my date with confidence. —Smitten author Joanna Goddard
8/25
DON’T wear anything too sexy over the underwear
9/25
DO Facebook him
10/25
But DON’T let him know you’ve been Google-stalking him all week
11/25
DON’T drink and date
One glass of wine is sufficient. Two or more could cause a potential relationship to die suddenly, instantly, or otherwise. My buddy Katherine is a lovely and intelligent young lady, but after a few drinks, she begins swearing like a sailor. She would never say such a thing if she wasn’t a little tipsy. Guys are turned off by her manner, and she frequently wonders why first dates seldom progress into second dates. *—Jess McCann, You Lost Him at Hello author
12/25
DO have a positive attitude
I tried to organize an interesting first date—something out of the ordinary. So I pick her up, it’s freezing outside, and the restaurant I was planning on taking her to is closed. We’re in an abandoned area, it’s freezing, and I’m not looking good. Finally, we discover a restaurant, but the menu is entirely in Korean. When we point to anything, it tastes like rubber chicken. Then, when we get at the bowling alley, we appear to be the only non-gang members present. But it was a fantastic date because she was really chill. Her upbeat demeanor dictated the course of the evening. —Evan Marc Katz, dating counselor and Why You’re Still Single author
13/25
DO order a big-girl meal
Do you really think a puny salad will hold you over all night?—The Frisky
14/25
DON’T question his height
If he’s 5’10” on his driver’s license, and in his heart, suspend your disbelief. Feel free to store it for something to make fun of later. —Tom Miller, Tango’s Daily Dish
15/25
DO act interested in what he is saying
Nobody wants to go on a first date with the human equivalent of a dead fish. If you don’t like where the date is going, you can end it early. But whether you’re weary, hungover, or unhappy about the impending economic collapse, don’t let it ruin your time together. Talk. Pose inquiries. Make direct eye contact. Dating Makes You Want to Die, by Daniel Holloway and Dorothy Robinson (But You Have to Do It Anyway)
16/25
DON’T turn your dates into therapy sessions
My friend Isabel just went through the worst year of her life. She lost her house to foreclosure and got into a lot of debt. When she went out with a guy, she would dump all of her problems on his plate. No one wants to hear about your sick cat, annoying boss, or ex-boyfriend who keeps following you around. Isabel should have asked more questions and listened more than she talked if she wanted to go on a second date. * —Jess McCann, who wrote the book “You Lost Him at Hello.”
17/25
On that note, DON’T psychoanalyze your date
A guy once got all Freud on me and asked me if I had trouble getting close to men because of my relationship with my father. Totally inappropriate, considering we’d just met.—The Frisky
18/25
But DON’T get too personal
One woman on our message boards talked about a guy who asked her how many kids she wanted. “I hope there will be at least one girl,” he said. Sweet, but a little early. Another woman wanted to know if it was normal for a guy to ask her about her credit score and credit limit. No, that’s not normal. —Josey Miller, “Sex on My Desk” on iVillage
19/25
DON’T talk about your ex
No good can come of this! You’ll seem either bitter, heartless or still hung-up—and any one of these is a huge turnoff.—Em and Lo, Daily Bedpost
20/25
No, really, DON’T talk about your ex
“What if” questions that start with “would you” or “can you believe” are obvious and show that your mind is elsewhere. So DON’T ask your date, “Would you ever, I mean ever, skip someone’s cousin’s wedding to go to a Final Four game?” —Tango’s Daily Dish, Tom Miller
21/25
DO discuss issues that are important to you
Why wait to find out that the two of you don’t see eye to eye on something you feel passionately about?—The Frisky
22/25
DON’T talk about sex
Unless you intend to have sex on the first date, in which case you should absolutely discuss your sexual history. However, if not, it’s fine to leave something to the imagination—and to store something for the second date. —Em and Lo from Daily Bedpost
23/25
DON’T let him take you to a second location if you don’t like him
Too often, I politely follow the guy to another bar after another when I really just want to go home and read. Both of you will be better off if you just say something. Single-ish, Erin Meanley
24/25
DON’T try to add him as a Facebook friend after the first date
It will only scare him and make him think you’re spying on him, which you are, of course. But that’s why Google exists!). —From Daily Bedpost, Em and Lo
25/25
DO break the dating rules
If you want to talk to him, give him a call. He’ll be glad you did. Why not make the first move if you want to? —DearSugar
Thanks for reading!
